While enjoying a meal with friends at a Florida restaurant in October, Rajee Narinesingh encountered an unpleasant incident. A woman approached her in the women’s bathroom and demanded that she leave.
“You need to leave this bathroom,” she declared, asserting that Narinesingh did not belong there. Narinesingh shared with The Daily Beast that the other diner regarded her with disdain, as if she were the lowest of the low. “If looks could take lives, I’d be six feet underground,” she expressed, emphasizing the intensity of the negative stares.
During the most recent confrontation, Narinesingh had already used the toilet. All she needed to do was wash up and leave before things escalated further. Despite mustering the courage to respond sarcastically to the woman’s provocation, saying, “I definitely don’t belong in the men’s room,” deep down, she was scared. Narinesingh could feel the panic overwhelming her: her palms were sweaty, her breath was heavy, and anxiety pierced through her stomach like a knife.
Florida’s bathroom ban stands out among the nine other states that have similar laws, as it is the only one that imposes criminal penalties for non-compliance. Breaking the regulations outlined in HB 1521 could lead to a misdemeanor trespassing charge, which carries a maximum punishment of one year in prison and a fine of up to $1,000.
The average Floridian is not aware of the true implications of HB 1521, as it only applies to certain establishments and not private businesses such as bars, cafés, grocery stores, restaurants, and shopping malls.
According to Gina Duncan, the strategic partnerships manager for Equality Florida, there is a misunderstanding among the general public regarding these bills. As a result, the statewide LGBTQ+ advocacy group has seen a rise in reports of harassment. Duncan shares an incident where a trans woman from central Florida reached out to her after being denied access to a restroom at a local cinema. The woman explained that a male customer had taken it upon himself to act as the bathroom monitor, questioning anyone who he believed to be transgender.
Duncan expresses concern about the way these bills are infiltrating society. He emphasizes that transgender individuals are being unfairly targeted and confronted with challenges while simply going about their daily routines.
‘It’s traumatizing’
The Daily Beast interviewed seven sources who have experienced heightened harassment and scrutiny since the implementation of Florida’s HB 1521. Surprisingly, this mistreatment frequently occurs in areas where the law is not applicable. It is worth noting that not all those affected by the law identify as transgender.
In September 2023, Kat Phoenix, a cisgender woman, found herself escorting her autistic son to a rest stop bathroom. As they approached the entrance, a woman attempted to obstruct their path, causing Kat to assertively push past her.
Since the law was passed, Speegle has completely stopped using public bathrooms unless it’s absolutely necessary. He even feels anxious about using the library because technically, he’s supposed to use the women’s bathroom. Speegle’s husband is the one who faces the most harassment due to his appearance in their area. As a result, Speegle prefers to stay home most of the time to avoid getting into trouble or being arrested. He also worries about his husband’s well-being and wants to protect him from any potential trouble.
Damm-Loring expresses her reluctance to engage in such discussions, especially with individuals who might pose a threat if they are dissatisfied with her response. She has gone to great lengths to avoid these conversations, even to the point of intentionally dehydrating herself to avoid using public restrooms when she is out. Additionally, she has chosen to forgo wearing makeup unless she is in the privacy of her own home and has started dressing in a more androgynous manner, hoping to go unnoticed.
‘ Basic human thing ’
Trans Floridians are taking various measures to ensure their safety under HB 1521. This includes adopting strategies such as using restrooms in groups and avoiding poorly lit facilities in remote areas. To empower members of the LGBTQ+ community, organizations like Found Family Collective in the Tampa Bay area offer self-defense classes. Additionally, Pink Pistols operates chapters in Tampa and Ocala, providing firearms training to LGBTQ+ individuals, enabling them to responsibly use firearms for self-protection.
Many of the individuals interviewed for this article revealed that they no longer venture out in public, not even for simple tasks like using the restroom.
Elliott King’s experience in January has made him more cautious about occupying public spaces. While he was getting his oil changed, he was confronted in the men’s bathroom by a stranger who questioned his gender. King confidently responded that he is a man, but the individual continued to stare at him for another 30 seconds before saying, “You don’t look like it.” Fearing the situation could escalate, King left the restroom and immediately called his boyfriend for support. He felt physically shaken, worried that the man could return and find him at any moment.
Although the incident did not lead to a violent confrontation, King is concerned that he may not be so lucky next time. He is eager to move out of Florida, but he has to wait for his partner to finish college before they can relocate. “All it takes is one person to attack you,” he explains. “I was really nervous about it turning physical because I’m not very tall or muscular. I pose no threat, and I’m aware of that.”
Narinesingh, an advocate for transgender rights, reflects on the current challenges faced by the trans community, which reminds her of the struggles experienced before the recent progress in LGBTQ+ equality. She recounts an incident from years ago when she joined a new job and was summoned to her supervisor’s office after he learned about her gender identity. He expressed his concerns, stating, “I don’t know what your intentions are for working here, but if it’s for making a political statement, we won’t tolerate it.” Despite clarifying that she applied for the job for the same reasons as everyone else – to support herself – her explanation had little impact. The company prohibited her from using the women’s restroom in the building, fearing it would be deemed “offensive.”
For nearly three years, Narinesingh had to make the long trek across the office, which was as long as a football field, every time she needed to use the bathroom. Her employers, she claims, reduced her pay to compensate for the time she spent away from her desk. While Narinesingh acknowledges that significant strides have been made since she endured such mistreatment, she is concerned that laws like HB 1521 are regressing society. Just a few weeks ago, she resorted to urinating in a bottle in her car rather than using a public restroom, fearing another unpleasant encounter.
“It’s a fundamental aspect of being human,” she affirms. “Using the restroom should be a simple, instinctive act. There are moments when I’m at home and I have this realization, where I tell myself, ‘Wow, Rajee, you’re still here. You’ve endured.’ I can’t fathom how I’ve managed to overcome the countless challenges life has thrown my way.”
