Aiexpress – This week, Saturday Night Live delivered its best cold open in a long time, with a satirical look at what the GOP’s boot-licking leaders may truly think about Donald Trump.
Following Trump’s triumph in South Carolina, Jim Risch (Mikey Day), Marco Rubio (Marcello Hernandez), Lindsey Graham (James Austin Johnson), and Tim Scott (Devon Walker) convened for cocktails, tater tots, and awkward talk about their feared leader.
Risch hinted at some potential Trump smack-talk when he said, “Sometimes I don’t know what my party is doing. I’ve been advocating for Ukraine’s funds for the past six months. It is vital to American security. Trump ended it with a single phone call. The man cares nothing about this country.” Sometimes I believe he’s dangerous.”
“And you just endorsed him, right,” asked Rubio.
“Yeah. Big time. Big time ,” Risch assured him. “He’s great.”
Rubio found it difficult to disagree with their judgment, and it was even more difficult to overcome the infamous “Little Marco” nickname that still plagues the Florida senator today.
“I’ve never been able to shake it,” Rubio stated. “People still yell at me in the airport. He sort of made my life horrible.”
“And you endorsed him, correct?” Risch inquired.
You probably already know where this is headed.
Graham and Scott, two additional Republicans whose associations with Trump have made their lives worse, quickly joined Risch and Rubio. However, like their Idaho and Florida counterparts, they appeared to be trapped in a form of Stockholm syndrome in which even Trump’s worst qualities are somehow admirable.
When questioned about the awful Fox News Town Hall he participated in with Donald Trump last week, Scott assured everyone that he had the upper hand throughout.
“[Trump] didn’t make me say that I hate [Nikki Haley],” Scott clarified. He said, ‘You must truly dislike her, you know.’ ” But you saw what I did, right? I got up to the mic and said, ‘No, I just love you.'”
“You showed him,” Graham encouraged his colleague—before reminding his colleagues of the time Trump doxxed him. “Yep, in 2015. In his speech, he gave out my personal telephone number to all of his supporters, and thousands of them called me up to rage at me, threatening my safety. I had to acquire a new phone.”
Risch improved on that story by claiming that “one of the January 6 rioters—I’m sorry, one of the January 6 tourists—pooped on the floor of my office.”
At one point, Graham, who was clearly upset, said, “Sometimes I think his behind is going to live 1,000 years.” They all agreed that Trump is a great man, even though they were so embarrassed to work for him. According to Graham, he may even be “the greatest president since Reagan.”
